Thursday, December 16, 2004

empty

i've been thinking about the past year since it's almost over, it hasn't been the best in retrospect. there was Damian's nana's funeral, my great uncle's funeral, the funeral of a friend of my parents who was murdered, my cat died, and what i'm currently still going through which is the hardest and most upsetting of everything. i'm not going into detail about it but it feels good to write.

i've always been a believer in karma but now i'm not so sure. i don't know what i could have possibly done so wrong or horrible.

needless to say christmas means nothing to me this year. i'm a huge fan of christmas and usually look forward to it all year, this time i don't even want it to come. it's going to be excruciating.

* okay, a confession. i do hold a bit of hope in my heart, i have my first ever serious christmas wish. *