Monday, October 25, 2004

c'est la vie

the universe is testing me and i don't know why. i'm pretty sure i've used up my alloted amount of tears for the year. i haven't much of an appetite (and when i do eat i just feel queezy afterwards), then there's the headaches and the general feeling of emptiness inside.

it's horrible to have to sit here at work and fake happiness, i just want them to leave me alone.

the end.

Friday, October 22, 2004

i'm purdy

i finally did it, after so long thinking "should i, shouldn't i?" i finally got extensions put in my hair. i was getting tired of always having short hair and i couldn't wait for it to grow out, so i made the jump. those things aren't cheap man! i figured what the hell, I'm worth it. i ran into a problem which was i fell in love with a pair of glasses on my way to the salon. they were a little on the pricey side too and there was no way i was going to be THAT generous to myself. damian was with me and being the sweetheart that he is, bought them for me as a suprise while i was getting my hair done. what a doll!

so now i've got my new flowing locks, my snazzalicious new specs, and i'm feeling good. the new me.

i think i like the bangs the best, i never thought i'd go back to bangs but these ones make me look so youthful.




*in all seriousness, these 2 stunning articles are part of damian's halloween costume*


Thursday, October 21, 2004

a personal history

poopies.jpg

i just got an email from kate in which she let me in on a little quirk i had when i was wee. i do not remember this AT ALL and i have changed since those days, i no longer have the same attachment. here it is (she also provided the little cartoon above):

i learned something quite hilarious about you last night.

apparently you had a real problem letting your poopies go. you wanted to
keep them. you would even go to such lengths as hiding in a corner and
pooping your diaper. if you did let them go you had to wave good-bye and say
"bye-bye poopies".

you are a fine piece of work.

kate


you want to know the real me? it might not be pretty, there are some things that i'm ashamed of. i'm not as passive and friendly as i may appear in my journal. I've got dark secrets in my past but if i can't let them out here, in my journal, where else can i do it?

* i choreographed dances to Laura Branigan's 'Gloria'.

* i rubbed kate's toothbrush along a bar of soap so she would get a suprise flavour intermixed with the mint.

* i licked icing off of a steak knife (tongues bleed a lot when forced to do so).

* i dragged kate through dog pee so i wouldn't have to clean it up.

* i ate lego.

* i threw toys at kate while she was sleeping (she'd awake surrounded by an army of happy meal collectables).

* i'd steal "cool" erasers from my classmates desks (if it was shaped like grapes or some other fun wild thing, i had to have it).

* in grade 3 i married andrew, a boy i had a crush on. it ended in a messy divorce and a custody battle over who got to keep the comet ball.

* i wrapped the dog up in tuba-ruba and took pictures.

* i squeezed a hot pepper into kate's eye.

* i ate the chocolates out of kate's advent calender then closed the little doors back up so she'd still think there was a sweet suprise underneath.

* i stole my friends fruit roll up out of her lunch and ate it in secret by the jungle gym.

yeah, so now you know.

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

hollywood rides with me

has anyone heard from harvey keitel lately? because, i think he drove me to the subway this morning. i swear to god that was him navigating the early morning roads on the streetcar. oh, and guess who was on my bus? Tessio, you know, abe vigoda.

if the universe is going to drop celebrity doppelgängers on public transit with me, i wish it NOT to be ones of the aging variety.

Thursday, October 14, 2004

the devil's footwear

i'm at home today with a raging case of blisters. i wore a pair of brand new pointy high heels yesterday and i'm paying for it. i wore them once before but i didn't walk home from the subway in them.

i stopped off at starr's work on my way home to drop off a quote to her boss (they want me to silk screen some shirts for the security guys). from there i sauntered home. with each set of clicks my heels made against the pavement, the pain grew. i made it to wellington street, so close to home, and that's when the thought "just take them off, walk barefoot" came into my head. i couldn't take it any longer, but was i really ready to shed my shoes? ready to place my delicate skin on naked city sidewalks? no, i wasn't. i pressed on, i held the wincing pain inside and kept a cool, composed expression on my face. an expression that read "i am a woman in heels, i can handle this, they're like clouds upon my feet".

when i finally reached my building and my mailbox inside of it, the shoes came off. it was like a cartoon, big red feet which you could hear pulsating like a heartbeat. i painfully walked to the elevator, stood tiptoe on it's filthy floors, sighed with relief when the door opened and i stepped out onto carpet, walked in my front door, and tossed the shoes yelling "devils!"

now here i sit, missing a day of work because i can not get a pair of shoes on my feet. i take it as a blessing though, now i have all day to work on jewellery (coz face it, christmas IS coming and we gotta be stocked). between jewels i might just get my oil paints out and mess around in puddles of colour. i do wish i could get shoes on so i could run out to my bead supplier and grab a spiced cider or a chai but shit, if i could get shoes on i'd be at work and none of that would matter anyway.

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

amanda the psychic receptionist

unless you've decided 2 assholes could be more usefull than one and would therefore like me to rip you a new one, do not ask me the following question when you call in and i inform you that the person you want to speak with is on the phone:

"well, do you know how long they'll be?"

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

flatus

it was most definitely thanksgiving yesterday, the streetcar was awash with turkey fart this morning!

Saturday, October 09, 2004

it ain't no tofurkey, this bastards got organs

clafouti.jpeg

kate and i have begun with the preparations for our feast. she made a mouth watering raspberry clafouti (above) for her and i for dessert. the boys can have their pumpkin pie, we don't like it. the turkey is going in the oven around 1:30 (it's not a big sonofabitch since only 2 people are eating it) and most of the prep work is done. cranberry sauce is made, stuffing is made, potatoes are soaking in their cold bath, we're looking pretty good.

one of the stipulations we had when we agreed, as vegetarians, to cook this dinner was that one of the guys had to reach into the bird and pull the goods out then stuff it back up with the yummy (if i do say so myself) stuffing i made. damian was grossed out by idea so it all rests on kevin's shoulders, what a good kid.

even after last weekends wine binge that left me hurting for the next 2 days, i believe i'll be indulging tonight. i no longer get instant nausea when i think of a glass of red, i no longer get the spins and a sour taste in my mouth when i think of a glass of white. yes, i think i'm cured.

more on the dinner as it progresses.

p.s. damian and i splurged with some money we came into and purchased, just the other day, a digital video camera. i'm so jazzed to get into editing and all that shit. if we can figure it out, you might just see some video up here sometime.


HAPPY THANKSGIVING MY FELLOW CANADIANS!

Friday, October 08, 2004

rouge tootsies

kels.jpg

last night i slept over at kate's place and we did it up girly. the plan was to get all of her fabric out, the bins upon bins of it, and cut out bags. that didn't happen, we decided to do it on saturday while the boys play 'x-men legends' (more about saturday later). instead we ordered pizza, painted our toenails red, and read cosmo. it was great, and the dogs were happy that i slept over.

saturday is going to be an interesting day as kate and i cook up a turkey dinner for our guys. yes, 2 vegetarians cooking a turkey dinner.





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Tuesday, October 05, 2004

a little psycho myself...

before i got in the shower this morning i put the t.v. on to check the weather. they went into a bit about the death of janet leigh. what could have come next? you got it, the shower scene from 'Psycho'. just what i needed before i got into a shower of my own...alone in the house.

it's just like when i was a kid visiting my grandparents in florida. we'd often go out on my grandpa's boat or get invited aboard a friends boat. it never failed that just as i was getting ready, packing my little bag full of friendship bracelet materials and colouring supplies, an ad for 'Jaws' would come on the t.v. i was leary as i strecthed my leg across the dock onto the boat, eyeing the crack of ocean beneath me. i imagined (i have always had an overactive imagination) tons of sharks swimming under the boat, just waiting for me to fall overboard. one time a friend of my grandpa's, Herbie (a little german guy who had the darkest tan and would always wear a belt above his bathing suit, around his ribcage area), invited us out on his rubber dingy to go over to "bird island". the island wasn't far at all so it wasn't going to be a long ride. i got in, we rounded the corner heading out of the lagoon where the boats docked, and we hit more open waters. i freaked out! we were way too close to the water for my liking, i could feel the water rushing under my bum as we buzzed over the wake of larger boats. i'm sure there were tears. my sister, always the braver one, lost out on that trip to the island because Jaws was coming for me.

Monday, October 04, 2004

flew

well it would appear that the amityville horror which was our office lunchroom has been taken care of. last week the floor was covered in dead flies, they'd get swept up but return the next day. quite nasty really.

Sunday, October 03, 2004

can you feel the eroticism?

loaded.jpg

so, that's my best friend and my husband rockin' each other....starr sure loves her Stoli. it's true, we've been stolen by "the drink" and sadly i'm posting in my journal. tonight was supposed to be filled with friends but damian came across an illness he couldn't resist which provided him with a sore throat and a craving for Dayquil. Starr came over, just Starr, for some wine and whatever came of the evening. it would seem a common cold has nothing against alcohol and carbonated soda, damian seems his regular self. Starr and i have been dancing our asses off to the likes of Duran Duran and god knows what. we've planned a karaoke night for the weekend after next with a slew of people, we've made drunken calls, people accepted, they want their 15 minutes.

for some reason i thought a post would be good right now. spelling errors should be accepted.

*end note* i'm totally fine with starr and damian in the above incriminating photo which i will save for any future lawsuits.